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**PRINT: FRIENDS FROM CINCINNATI: Installment 24 features this part coming-of-age short by Chicago's Patrick Somerville, author of the Trouble collection of shorts out in 2006. | PAST BROADSHEETS |

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Mickey Hess

What juices do you recommend in hot weather?

The bitter fruit of sexual frustration revealing itself.

You're into your seventies and still going strong. How long have you been juicing?

Since Miguel got his head bashed in by the dealer we tried to rip off last night.

What juices are good to serve at parties?

You each jab a syringe filled with a take-out dosage of Dr. Feelgood's amphetamine solution into your ass.

What are your favorite juices?

Some vodka-based cocktail.

What are the best juices to drink with meals?

Actually nothing but rounded bits of plastic with a yellow dust of pure meth.

I want to drink juices at the office. How do I take fresh juices to work and keep them viable?

The thing is, I'm still fighting back the heebie-jeebies from this drop in my dose of mojo juice.

If I am out for the day and I want to buy some carrot juice, is that all right?

Day to day & shit, I don't know where I'm gonna wind up.

When I am juicing, should I use an apple to clean the juicer when I want to switch from fruits to vegetables, or vice versa?

Fucking A.

Mickey will be joining us for a reading at Quimby's in Chicago, 16 Aug 2003. Click here for details.